Baby On the Way

Our first (and only, at this point) child was born in a birthing center. As soon as we knew there was a baby coming, we started looking for alternatives to a hospital, for a number of reasons, none of which were that we are anti-modern-medicine.

Being firm in our belief that many “everyday” tests associated with pregnancy, labor, and delivery are unnecessary for a normal, healthy pregnancy, we were looking for a safe alternative that would allow us a bit more breathing room while still keeping close enough tabs on mom and baby to recognize, early on, if we needed to take advantage of some of those tests . . . as needed, mind you. With the center that we chose, many of those test, like the sonogram/ultrasound, were available, if we wanted them, but only the basics were strongly encouraged or required. The Certified Nurse-Midwives (CNMs) with whom we were working have alternative, unobtrusive ways of checking in the baby and making sure the mom is in good shape.

One of the things the midwives can’t determine, though, is the gender of the baby. There are averages, with the heart rate, for example, that are different between boys and girls, but our baby ended up proving that prediction method to be wrong, anyway. We could have had an ultrasound (that may or may not have shown us who the person inside was, whether Johnny or Jenny), but since we didn’t need an ultrasound, we opted out. We didn’t know about tools like the Chinese pregnancy calendar–a chart that, from the mother’s age and the month the baby was conceived, is supposed to tell you the baby’s gender–so we were stuck with all the old wives’ tales. Since the baby was riding low, he was a boy. Since there had been some intense nausea, fatigue, and headaches during the first trimester, she was a girl. Since there was a “baby ball” in the front, rather than overall weight gain, he was a boy. Since there wasn’t a lot of trouble with acne, she was a girl. Since, after the first round of being uncomfortable, it was turning out to be a great pregnancy, he was a boy. Since . . . . From all that we were reading and being told, we almost started to wonder if we had twins. As it turned out, the majority was wrong, in our case.

Before all of that, though, once we realized that pregnancy symptoms had begun, we picked up a test kit at the grocery store. Suddenly, we realized that we needed to find a birthing center. In the meantime, we were rather curious about when we should expect this kid’s arrival. We used a due date calculator that we found on-line, to get us in the right ballpark, and then the CNM that met with us at our first visit verified and adjusted. It was really nice to have some kind of an idea, during the time we were looking for the right center.